I have saved a small fortune recently. Note that I didn’t say that I had won the lottery, just that I had managed to SAVE some money.
Unusual doesn’t begin to describe this event, unheard of would be more like it. You know what though, it really hasn’t been hard but it has been 100% effective! What’s my secret? I don’t take out my purse anymore unless I have a planned spend!
I always used to take my handbag with me everywhere, which meant anything I suddenly fancied was readily available to me. Chocolate, croissants, bagels, magazines, sweets, lunches and so on. Not one to usually have any cash, that stopped being a problem the day the Tesco Express moved in. Cards were now a good as money!
But if I carry neither cards, nor money, short of offering some other service (think of washing up rather than the second oldest profession – does anyone actually know what the oldest profession is, please advise if you do) then I can’t spend. End of!
Now I just need to be super good and transfer all of the saved money into a savings account rather than using it for one of those even bigger shopping mall purchases!
I expected to feel resigned on Madiba’s passing. After all, he was old, he was in poor health, so we had been given due warning, and what an amazing legacy! To be loved by the world and surrounded by family and friends, probably passing away in your sleep, who wouldn’t want that. And who of us should be sad about such a death?
Yet sad I am. I may never have known him, yet he felt like my father too, as well as the father of South Africa. I am pretty sure that there is nothing for which I will ever be giving up 27 years of my life. Let alone have a belief for which I am prepared to die. That is before you throw in wanting all to be equal rather than turning the table on previous oppressors and turning them into the oppressed. Not even to just withhold revenge, but to extend the hand of forgiveness and peace. To call Nelson Mandela and his legacy ‘special’ seems positively lame. He was a legend and will now be an icon.
Barak Obama is right. How can we apply Mandela’s teaching by example in our own lives? Do we have to have a cause to believe in as much as he did? Do we need to be the humble yet clear leader and statesman that he was? Or do we need to turn our back on revenge and hurt, and reach out for forgiveness and love when others hurt us? Or do we need to turn the circumstances in which we find ourselves into the best situation that we can, if need be, making prison walls our home and our jailers our friends? When our relationships and even marriages break down, do we need to find a way to remain in a positive relationship, for the sake of what we had our future peace and the children we bore?
The questions could go on and on. From the global, to the spiritual to the one to one and the anecdotes of all who knew him saying how special He made Them feel, when they were the ones who felt honoured to be meeting him. Feel free to choose your own questions and your own answers but whatever you do, identify what it is you take from his life and keep applying it to your own.
I never met you Madiba, although I so desperately wanted to. Thank you for all that you meant to me and thank you for all that you did for South Africa. I will tell my children and my children’s children of you and your legacy. And may your story continue always. Rest in peace.
How’s your music mentality? My what? you ask. Music mentality I said. Your emotional age when you listen to certain pieces or types of music. This is a completely made up term which came to me as I watched Ellie Goulding in the music video above. Not only do I completely love the song and despite my sofa bound state (unwell at present, see previous post) was dancing to the best of my limited abilities, but I adored the hoody, mini-skirt and boots she wore as an outfit too. Excellent. I could see myself in the same outfit, in the same location, dancing and singing my heart out to the very same song. And there you have it, I was 20 again.
Those of you reading this blog for long enough, know that my 20s were no party and I certainly didn’t have the confidence to pull off any of the above. Now of course I do, but with having had a special birthday and 2 kids under my belt, minus Victoria Beckham’s figure, people would call such a change in my wardrobe a midlife crisis.
Who cares! In my mind I was a kicking it 20-something, in the same way that people with dementia when taken back to music and surroundings from their formative eras seem to lose their dementia.
By all means splash out on new war paint (make-up) or if you really want and can afford it the surgery (I bet you don’t need it though), but for me I’ll take the hoody, boots, mini and soundtrack anytime. Midlife crisis indeed!
If I haven’t mentioned this before it is a fabulous book. One for all women to go out and purchase a copy, read it then lend it to their husbands and then pass it on as a legacy to their daughters. So far I have only borrowed mine from a library, but when funds permit, the book will be mine!
I was thinking about it today as I helped put up adverts for the Christmas Fayre on Saturday, for the PTA. I was alongside a very interesting woman, who in a past life, as she put it, had worked in film promotions for 20th century fox. According to her what she used to do wasn’t very glamorous, but I stopped believing her when she mentioned doing work for Tom Cruise! Name dropping aside, the job she had been in carried more money, glamour, status and interest than what she did now – book-keeping for a family relative, but had to be given up when she had children!
Why? Why is it always us women who make the career sacrifices if we don’t want our children to be in childcare more than they are with family? Why can’t we all agree that Mum can be off a year to breastfeed baby (if she is breastfeeding for a year, if not shorten this time accordingly) and then maybe Mum and Dad work 4 days so children are only in childcare for 3?
Why is it that so often Dad goes back to work full-time and continues to grow his career, salary and status, whilst Mum drops to 3 days and is barely noticed in what she does any more, essentially plugging the gaps that those more important in the workplace don’t wish to fill!
Like the book says, I am going to lean in when I find something I want to do, and regarding Little Lady I shall teach her all of this from the outset so that she doesn’t get blindsided and bored to tears like so many of her female elders have!
My friend that I told you about in ‘If you want something, ask’ is off to the ball! Her Other Half duly considered everything she had said and once a friend of his decided that he was going to go to the meal too, all the stars became aligned and he told my friend to get a babysitter.
Mrs Busybody here couldn’t be more pleased!
As I lie here feeling very sorry for myself – think sore throat, weak, upset tummy, vomiting and temperature – I sometimes wonder if I will ever be able to achieve anything ever again! Yet here I am making the time and effort to write this blog.
When we are up on our feet we don’t make the time to look down, it takes all of our effort to keep all of the balls we are juggling up in the air. When we are on our knees though, as much as we may feel like giving up that’s when we need to look up, not give up. Look up at all the people we love, the things we love to do and the places we love to visit. That will help us in the mental and physical fight for recovery and for those who will not recover, it may still extend their life.